for your dining pleasure

While dining out at Applebee's this evening, I realized several things:

• My taste in restaurants needs to grow up - I need a place with extremely high backs on the booths because I don't like watching other people eat.
• If your teeth are black, I know you're happy you still have them, but please PLEASE do not consistently grin with your mouth open
• Keep your voice down in a public restaurant; i.e. if I wanted to know about some girl staying at Frank's place and wearing Frank's pants, I'd pull up a chair at your table to be part of your conversation
• I don't claim to be an extremely high tipper but I generally leave more than the standard 15% so please don't have me pay the bill, say you'll be right back with the dessert to go and then start sweeping the floor around me leaving me to wait another FIFTEEN minutes until I call your attention and you apologize for desserts that are already in to go cups when you put the order in. I WANT 5% OF MY TIP BACK.
• Any of the above said *could be* a bit distorted as I had 2 ultimate long island iced teas and they still seem to do the trick of getting me pretty tipsy quickly. I still reserve the right to stand by my word - in my head, it's legit.

♥berlin™